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Alternative Trek Commentaries

a series of conversations between Anon and Anon2, with occasional special guests
transcribed and captioned by Anon (note 1)


The Alternative Trek Commentaries are a series of conversations on Star Trek, originally purely based on The Next Generation but now also spanning The Original Series. Two drunk freaks of nature are going through the history of Next Gen, right from its wank beginnings to comment on both its brilliance and stupidity. They're Trek fans, but at least they're honest about they're feelings rather than continually sucking Paramount's fat corporate cock.

Bad language is present throughout. You have been warned.


The Next Generation Season 1
1.01/1.02: Encounter at Farpoint, Parts 1 and 2
1.03: The Naked Now
1.04: Code of Honor
1.05: The Last Outpost
1.06: Where No One Has Gone Before
1.07: Lonely Among Us
1.08: Justice
1.09: The Battle
1.10: Hide & Q
1.11: Haven
1.12: The Big Goodbye
1.13: Datalore
1.14: Angel One
1.15: 11001001
1.16: Too Short a Season
1.17: When the Bough Breaks
1.18: Home Soil
1.19: Coming of Age
1.20: Heart of Glory
1.21: The Arsenal of Freedom
1.22: Symbiosis
1.23: Skin of Evil
1.24: We'll Always have Paris
1.25: Conspiracy
1.26: The Neutral Zone

The Next Generation Season 2
2.01: The Child
2.02: Where Silence Has Lease
2.03: Elementary, Dear Data
2.04: The Outrageous Okona
2.05: Loud as a Whisper
2.06: The Schizoid Man
2.07: Unnatural Selection
2.08: A Matter of Honor
2.09: The Measure of a Man
2.10: The Dauphin
2.11: Contagion
2.12: The Royale
2.13: Time Squared
2.14: The Icarus Factor
2.15: Pen Pals
2.16: Q Who
2.17: Samaritan Snare
2.18: Up the Long Ladder
2.19: Manhunt
2.20: The Emissary
2.21: Peak Performance
2.22: Shades of Gray

The Next Generation Season 3
3.01: Evolution
3.02: The Ensigns of Command
3.03: The Survivors
3.04: Who Watches the Watchers
3.05: The Bonding
3.06: Booby Trap
3.07: The Enemy
3.08: The Price
3.09: The Vengeance Factor
3.10: The Defector

The Original Series Season 1
1.01: The Cage


Forthcoming Commentaries

We've done commentaries for the following episodes too. We just need to get around to transcribing them.

The Next Generation (TNG)The Original Series (TOS) (note 2)
3.11: The Hunted
3.12: The High Ground
3.13: Déjà Q
3.14: A Matter of Perspective
3.15: Yesterday's Enterprise
3.16: The Offspring
3.17: Sins of the Father
3.18: Allegiance
3.19: Captain's Holiday
3.20: Tin Man
3.21: Hollow Pursuits
3.22: The Most Toys
3.23: Sarek
3.24: Ménage à Troi
3.25: Transfigurations
1.02: Where No Man Has Gone Before
1.03: The Corbomite Maneuver
1.04: Mudd's Women
1.05: The Enemy Within
1.06: The Man Trap
1.07: The Naked Time
1.08: Charlie X
1.09: Balance of Terror
1.10: What Are Little Girls Made Of?
1.11: Dagger of the Mind
1.12: Miri
1.13: The Conscience of the King


Anon's episode rankings: (note 3)
The Next GenerationThe Original Series
  1. Q Who
  2. The Measure of a Man
  3. The Defector
  4. The Enemy
  5. A Matter of Honor
  6. The Big Goodbye
  7. 11001001
  8. Contagion
  9. Time Squared
  10. The Battle
  11. Where No One Has Gone Before
  12. Conspiracy
  13. Elementary, Dear Data
  14. The Price
  15. Datalore
  16. The Emissary
  17. The Survivors
  18. Heart of Glory
  19. We'll Always have Paris
  20. Evolution
  21. Peak Performance
  22. The Arsenal of Freedom
  23. Where Silence Has Lease
  24. The Dauphin
  25. Loud as a Whisper
  26. The Vengeance Factor
  27. The Ensigns of Command
  28. Booby Trap
  29. The Bonding
  30. The Naked Now
  31. The Royale
  32. Hide & Q
  33. The Outrageous Okona
  34. Symbiosis
  35. Too Short a Season
  36. Encounter at Farpoint, Parts 1 and 2
  37. Haven
  38. The Last Outpost
  39. The Neutral Zone
  40. The Schizoid Man
  41. Coming of Age
  42. Who Watches the Watchers
  43. Home Soil
  44. Skin of Evil
  45. Manhunt
  46. Pen Pals
  47. The Icarus Factor
  48. Samaritan Snare
  49. Unnatural Selection
  50. Justice
  51. The Child
  52. Code of Honor
  53. Lonely Among Us
  54. Shades of Gray
  55. Angel One
  56. Up the Long Ladder
  57. When the Bough Breaks
  1. The Cage (durr!)

Card Counts
Episode Anon Anon2 Total
Encounter at Farpoint 1 4 5
The Naked Now 2 1 3
Code of Honor 0 0 0
The Last Outpost 2 2 4
Where No One Has Gone Before 5 3 8
Lonely Among Us 0 0 0
Justice 2 2 4
The Battle 2 3 5
Hide & Q 8 6 14
Haven 2 1.5 3.5
The Big Goodbye 1 0 1
Datalore 1 2 3
Angel One 1 0 1
11001001 2 2 4
Too Short a Season 0 2 2
When the Bough Breaks 1 0 1
Home Soil 0 1 1
Coming of Age 2 1 3
Heart of Glory 3 1 4
The Arsenal of Freedom 3 2 5
Symbiosis 0 1 1
Skin of Evil 3 2 5
We'll Always have Paris 6 5 11
Conspiracy 1 1 2
The Neutral Zone 3 1 4
The Child 0 1 1
Where Silence Has Lease 2 2 4
Elementary, Dear Data 1 1 2
The Outrageous Okona 0 0 0
Loud as a Whisper 1 0 1
The Schizoid Man 1 0 1
Unnatural Selection 1 1 2
A Matter of Honor 2 1 3
The Measure of a Man 1 1 2
The Dauphin 2 1 3
Contagion 3 3 6
The Royale 4 4 8
Time Squared 1 1 2
The Icarus Factor TBC TBC TBC
Pen Pals 2 0 2
Q Who 1 3 4
Samaritan Snare 3 2 5
Up the Long Ladder 0 0 0
Manhunt 0 0 0
The Emissary 1 1 2
Peak Performance 2 1 3
Shades of Gray 0 0 0
Evolution 1 1 2
The Ensigns of Command 0 1 1
The Survivors 3 2 5
Who Watches the Watchers 1 1 2
The Bonding 0 0 0
Booby Trap 2 1 3
The Enemy 0 0 0
The Price 2 1 3
The Vengeance Factor 3 1 4
The Defector 0 1 1
Total 91 75.5 166.5

Notes:

1 Captions for Manhunt and The Emissary by Anon and Anon2.
2 The Original Series is being watched in production order rather than broadcast order. Why? This was the order of the original VHS releases that I'm most familiar with.
3 Encounter at Farpoint is officially 2 episodes due to broadcasts in syndication, but just 1 episode in this list as we watched it as a feature-length episode on DVD. All Good Things will probably be the same. Don't know about The Menagerie.


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